A long awaited update and news of a new album

Since moving to Brooklyn, New York in 2014 I have learned a tremendous amount about  who I am and what I am made of.  I have learned how to make a life touring out on the road while tending to love and searching for happiness in the arts.


Photographer: A Wild Escape

It has not always been what I imagined it to be, actually it has not been anything what I imagined it to be. Yet, amidst the changes New York has taught me to stay present, push hard and to never give up even when I feel that I can not go any further. In all candidness this has been the case more than a few times as a life in the arts is one of the most difficult pursuits I have ever journeyed.


Photographer: Marc England II

Yet, I have been blessed to grow up in the free world and to choose to live a life in the arts. The rough translation of that last sentence is that I choose to live or dye by the sword of the arts.

With the rapid changes in the Music Industry  moving more towards a “streaming numbers based economy” I have been feeling the pressure more and more.

Some days, I am on top of the world with how things are flowing and other days I feel as though I want to throw it all in.

Then I step on stage and I remember my “why”, for the stage is the great equalizer.


Photographer: Marc England II

Music is meant to be shared, heard and felt in ones heart because music connects us in ways that nothing else on this planet can. It is universal and holds us together in the same way blood does.


Photographer: Lauren Stonestreet

Through songwriting, performing and living out on the road I have learned that I love music now more than ever. I am more vulnerable and honest because of music and I hope to continue to grow into a better songwriter and performer in spite of myself getting in the way.

With all of that said, I am proud to announce that our (The Bergamot’s) new album Mayflies is out now! 

Screen Shot 2019-10-01 at 4.10.10 PM

This album was written by Nathaniel Hoff, recorded in London with Matt Wiggins and his team. Recording this album was once of the most incredible life experiences I have ever been apart of.

Since releasing Mayflies we have received many beautiful notes and letters from our fans and it has been the most highly-critically acclaimed album that we have ever released.

Now we are so excited to share with you our new album ‘MAYFLIES

Over the last few years we’ve been touring all over world performing new songs, meeting kindhearted humans and remembering to hold empathy for each other in hopes of fostering unity in our divided world .

It hasn’t always been an easy journey but low’s remind us of the sweetness of the highs .

The songs on this album were written by Nathaniel while we were out on the Unity Collective 50 state tour (2016) and they were recorded/produced in closets, on kitchen tables, and in beautiful chic London studios with our incredible producer Matt Wiggins @wiggy321 (a MASSIVE thank you to Matt for believing in this project- we owe you more than you’ll ever know your a musical beast and inspiration) .

The album is heavily influenced by being open to letting go and not being afraid of the unknown. Mayflies is an exploration of the edges uncovering the dark-side of our culture while choosing to focus on the light .

As we explored new sonic landscapes in London we developed a brand new sound . .
We want our listeners to feel the unity between our voices, the vulnerability within our souls, and the fragility of the present moment .

As the Mayfly teaches us when you only have 24 hours to live it’s not about how long you have here on earth rather it’s about what you do with your time that counts. Listen to and share this new album if you feel compelled.

Thank you to everyone that contributed including every single one of our fans who crowd funded this album. We love you! Full credits below 🙏🏼. Lyrics and music by Nathaniel Paul Hoff
Produced and engineered by Matt Wiggins
(with the exception of P.D.R. and  L.A. produced by Nathaniel Paul Hoff)
Mixed by Matt Wiggins
Recorded at No. 1 Baltic Place, London
Studio Assistant – Jack Chown
Mastered by Randy Merrill of Sterling Sound
Nathaniel Hoff: Vocals, Guitar, Bass, Drums
Jillian Speece: Vocals
Ollie Hopkins – Bass
Bo Morgan – Drums
Orlando Leopard – Synth
Art Design – Brad Wolf @bradmwolf


2015 in review

2015 has been one beautiful year full of many miracles. Today I wish you a very blessed and bright New Years Eve and a very Happy New Year.



Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 4,300 times in 2015. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 4 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

5 Tips on Becoming Truely Free

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience. – Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Lets get one thing straight, no one likes being told what to do. Can you remember a time in your life when you felt pressure to do something you did not want to do just because someone told you to do it. Deep in your soul you felt like this person was chipping away at your free-will. Well I have been there, and now that I think about it on some level we all have.

In my life I cringe when people tell me things like, “you need to get a real job” or “you should cut all your hair off, no you should grow it long”, or you should do this or you should do that. Uhh, I am living my own life and have free will to do as I choose. This is independence, this is the beginning of freedom.

At one point during my later adolescence years I kept hearing “You Should”, so many times that I literally spent a whole year erasing those words from my personal vocabulary.

I did this so I would never bring someone else to a space to feel as if I was infringing upon there free will.

Needless to say, the idea of freedom is something that comes from the soul .

“The soul is space, immensity, freedom to expand, reach out, embrace the infinite.” – Dr. Wayne Dyer

The student should constantly look within herself and see what habits and creations are there that need to be plucked out and disposed of. For only by refusing to any longer allow habits of judging, condemning, and criticizing to exist can she be free.

The true activity of the student is only to perfect her own world and she can not do it as long as she sees imperfection in the world of any of God’s children.

– Dr Wayne Dyer

To Become Free of The False Self we must Seek to Understand The Ego. 

According to Dr. Wayne Dyer, the false self is the Ego. The Ego is the part of us that has come to believe that, who I am is defined by six things;

  1. Who I am is, what I have. ( we spend a hunk of our life obtaining as much as we can.) Do yourself a favor give away everything you own, let go of all of it of everything you had.
  2. Who I am is, what I accomplish ( we spend a hunk of our life focused on what I accomplish, how many promotions I have had, what you own, what cloths you wear, labels you have)
  3. Who I am is, what other people think of me (we spend a hunk of our life focused on I am my reputation, peer reviews, getting the approval of others, pleasing other people.) What you think of me is none of your business
  4. Who I am is separate from everyone else (We are raised in competition with everyone else, we have to be number one, defeat everyone else I have to be better than someone else to be fulfilled in life)
  5. Who I am is separate not only from everyone else and from what is missing in my life, I am separate from God. The tao teaches us that there is no place that God is not, then if there is no place God is not, God must be in me, God must be in all things. Thus, I must re-join myself to God, I must re-yoga/unite myself with God.

We must stop evaluating ourselves, who we are on the bases of these False Ego Identifiers. And rather begin to see ourselves as divine love, as pieces of God.

“You are not here to accomplish anything, you are not here to be better than anyone else, your not here to win, you are here to truly love yourself. All you have to do is love yourself. Just spend 15 minutes a day being in a state of appreciate for the I am presence that you are.” – Dr Wayne Dyer

This divine love starts with divine self acceptance.

” Look at yourself and say I accept me for me and what I am now with all of my imperfect imperfections. ” 

Step two, once we accept ourselves we must accept those around us and state,

“I accept you for what you are.” 

If you have found yourself in a difficult relationship that is consuming you with negative emotions it may be good to walk yourself down this path,

I am sent here after a series of impossible coincidences, I sit here filled with anger, rage, and bitterness towards how you have treated me, blank and blank.


{insert persons name here}, from this moment on I send you love, who am I to judge you and condemn you, you did what you knew how to do, given the conditions of your life and I accept you for it.

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”

Peacefully release the anger out of you. 

In order to attract the elements that will bring you the ability to manifest into your life what you want.

Remember we do not manifest what we want that coming from a place of lack/missing, we manifest what we are!

The angels who will guide you throughout your life will only be there for you when they recognize themselves in you.

They can not recognize themselves in you and guide you when you are filled with hatred, anger, judgement, condemnation, bitterness, fear, anxiety, stress.

Let all of that go and be love.

Shine ON,




A Shooting Star in New York City?


Saturday night while walking with friends downtown Manhattan my friend Evan asked, “so Jillian, you travel a lot what would you say your most favorite cities are?”

I paused, and said ummm tough question. Initially I wanted to say New York City but I knew that was not the exact question so I said, ” Cannes, France, Santa Cruz, CA, Seattle, WA, and defiantly the Bay area on a whole. As I was about to conclude, I said well obviously I am in Love with New York City which is why I choose to live here.

new york city at night

Right after my lips stopped moving after saying I loved New York City I saw a shooting star!

Mind you we are downtown Manhattan headed to Abraço one of our favorite coffee spots in the village and BOOM, a shooting star soars through the clear evening sky.


My mind was officially BLOWN.

For some odd reason I only thought shooting stars only existed amidst the sandy beaches of Lake Michigan or while sitting on boulders watching the stars in Colorado.

Yet, there it was soaring through the sky as I walked amidst skyscrapers headed into the Village.

In these unraveling moments a miracle happens and your heart believes a bit more. Your senses awaken to the endless possibilities that this beautiful world has to offer.


Two other notable things that occurred recently. Yesterday my husband and I hung out with Matt + Kim (Sunday December 5th at Toby’s Estate). They have been two of our music heros for years. It was pretty miraculous.

Secondly, Tuesday the 24th of November as we were paying our toll entering into Granger, Indiana for Thanksgiving we saw a shooting star together.


Miracles happen everyday, to see them we must first believe and hold fast to the miracle mindset. ❤

Shine ON & Merry Christmas… ( Happy Hanukkah too)



A gift of the whole Universe awaits


Two years ago I walked into my friend Jennifer’s kitchen and read this, “This food is a gift of the Whole Universe the earth, the sky, and much hard work. Let us live in a way we are WORTHY to receive it.”

When I read this the first time I was taken back because it resonated deeply within my soul. I had to read it a few times because each time these words connected to the very fibers of my consiousness.

This message is humble, divine, and nourishing. Once I get a chalkboard, you can rest assured this message will exist in my heart and on our fridge in our Brooklyn, kitchen.

As the Christmas season is upon us let us give thanks for we are WORTHY beautiful souls who live in a way where we are deserving of great food, happiness, and infinite joy.

Shine ON + Merry Christmas //




Find Balance + Love For The Right Reasons


My cousin posted this today on her facebook wall. Lately she has been sharing so many inspiring messages that I get giddy with excitement to see what she is up to.

In general I try to keep my social media at a distance but in one’s life there is an ebb and flow to it all.


Needless to say, it is late at night. I am tired. My hands are tired from typing on my computer all day long, yet I am blessed because I hold hope for a brighter tomorrow.

If it is true that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you handle it then yoga + mediation will be the pillars to help me handle the 10% with more ease. Because recently, life has gotten a little crazy.


Ok, a lot crazy! With juggling, tour dates in different countries, meetings, emails, finding time to eat in New York City(where everything is go, go, go), with a huge launch of The Unity Collective USA peace movement, and on top of it all juggling family around the holidays.

Phew, yes lots of good, good, things happening, and yet right in this moment I feel both blessed and like there is a void, perhaps that void is not having enough quiet time for solidarity.


Or maybe its missing out on fun girls nights, or cuddle time with furry friends like Wilco my favorite rescue pup in the whole wide world.

The holiday season can be damn right overwhelming, which brings me back to the beautiful quote at the top of the page “Find Balance…”

Sometimes, when I find yourself alone at 12:58AM sitting staring eyes glazed over into your computer screen, at my teeny tiny black Ikea kitchen, in my teeny tiny NYC apartment all I desire is to be nourished.

This time not by food (since its so late) but rather by uplifting words. This is how I found that beautiful quote tonight.


Because for every step I take in the right direction, I begin forgoing all the other paths.

It can be hard at times looking back at all the countless steps that could have diverged me from the path I am on and knowing that though I may falter I must keep going forward. Holding the faith, hope, and love and letting go of the rest.

In the quiet moments of life as I press forward. When my feet press firmly against the new stones that I just stepped upon. I know in my soul that I are gaining traction towards  my higher self and dreams.

Shine ON dear one, find balance, + go forth and love for all the right reasons.





What is The Unity Collective USA

Final pic Kick

  • The Unity Collective USA is a movement for Unity, created by the Brooklyn, New York band, The Bergamot. We are inviting our fans and fellow Americans to sign our Volvo (with 263,000 miles on it) with a unifying message of hope.
  • Thus, our car becomes a symbol of peace and a collective art piece.
  • Culminating in a documentary of uplifting music + unifying signatures + amazing stories.
  • With your help we are raising $15,000.00  by December 17th, 2015 to make this documentary come to life. However, we need your help to do this.
  • Please help today by becoming a backer and joining the movement at our Kickstarter page www.theunitycollectiveusa.com, please join us and be the experience.


The Story:

After rigorously touring for over five months we finally arrived home to our tiny beautiful Brooklyn apartment. On tour we had countless hours of travel time, with plenty of time to talk about how we could make a grater impact on the world at large.

Out of our desire to be the change in the world and truly help others a dream was born, The Unity Collective USAThe Unity Collective USA is a movement we (The Bergamot) started in hopes to be a beckon of light amidst a world that is ridden with growing fears.

Essentially, Nathaniel and I are setting out January 1st, 2016 with our voices, and guitar in hand to tour across the contiguous 50 states of America, garnering uplifting signatures onto our (2002 Volvo w/ 263,000 miles), while documenting the whole journey producing one uplifting documentary.




Sign the Car USA. The Bergamot has set out to create a collective art piece with our fans, culminating in a documentary of uplifting music,  unifying signatures, and amazing stories.

We are inviting you to join our movement and become a backer now because at the end of the day it’s all about what you’re doing with the time you have.


Please head over to www.theunitycollectiveusa.com to pledge + show your support for this project. We would love you to ink up our car too, so if you want to host a show at your home let us know here.

We have until December 17th, 2015 to raise 15K, its an all or nothing platform. Join us now, and grab The Unity Collective T-shirt we promise they are going to be super soft + way rad.

Love to you always + Shine ON,


Hiding behind the busy-ness?

Charlottesville, VA TFHouse

taken by Stephen Stonestreet at our house concert in Charlottesville, Virginia

With Instagram, Facebook, tweets and so many other distractions it seems that there is little time for solitude and reflection.

My life is just blasted with busy-ness from the constant grind of business to working on new projects, cooking, touring, packing, unpacking, this phone call or that meeting, I mean do you feel me here people?

One day I am catching a flight from Miami to Madrid, the next a flight from Nice, France to Paris, then back to the States. Phew, it can be exhausting at times and I even just caught a cold eeekk.


this was taken by our friend Joel Cochran at our show in South Bend on October 16th, 2015 at the Birdsell Mansion.

Don’t get me wrong here I adore my life for I have had the pleasure of co-creating it with the God the Divine Boss, or as I have said the Omnipotent Love Bomb!

Sure it has its challenges but I am far stronger having them, (being able to get back up and dust myself off) then if I was to live a life of a hermit.

On the flip side, I relish in the sweet moments like…

  • stepping on stage to perform to bring joy to our fans, taking in the autumn air on a long walk, indulging in 2 o’clock tea time with family, working out, snuggling with my husband under the warmth of our down blanket in the morning hours, laughing with friends, writing a new song, and I just I love making banana bread while filling our kitchen with its warmth then eating it up out of the oven. yum!
  • These simple moments are the ones I just adore and cherish the most.

taken by even perigo on our wedding day at Notre Dame University. I just visited here a few days ago when we came back home for the funeral.

Just yesterday we took a trip from New York back to our hometown to say goodbye to my husbands Grandpa “Charlie Webber”.


evan perigo shot this at our wedding of my husband and Grandma and Grandpa

He had passed away a week ago peacefully in his sleep. Actually, he died 6 months after his beloved wife Grandma Joan and just a few days before there 65th anniversary! True love is real, and yes it is worth waiting for.


all of us together at our wedding in 2013 (photo taken by evan perigo)

Clearly Grandpa did not want to miss out on celebrating it with his bride in heaven so there he went. All of us bid him farewell yesterday at a beautiful memorial Mass in which we performed our original song “Young Again” in his honor. ( we still have to record it, but I promise we will do it soon)

Singing “Young Again” in church was a raw and difficult thing for me to do with my husband Nathaniel because it was such an emotional day and all of our family was sobbing just feet away from us.


together in paris with our friend bradley leach who took this photo.

In these very real authentic moments I often think about how blessed I am to be able to share in the experience of life through music.

Music is just so incredible it offers us a way to share a feeling and articulate that emotion via music to others and thus allow them to feel and share in that very real emotion too.

Its a small miracle if you think about it. Below, I have added a great video about busy-ness and life. Peeling back the layers and discovering your voice and going after your passion.


taking in Paris by Bradley Leach September 2015

These are the things I wish for everyone, those are the things I wish for you.

As I continue discovering my voice through the busy-ness of life I often return to the solitude to reflect upon where I have been, who I have loved, and where I am going.

In the solitude I find myself and my true voice. I invite you to enjoy thirty minutes of solitude today and reflect on where you have been and where you would like to go.

For life is to short to not do what you love, with the ones you love most. I hope you enjoy this video and a little bit of solitude.

Shine ON /// Jillian

Dear Human :: You’ve Got it All Wrong


Dear Human: You’ve got it all wrong.

You didn’t come here to master unconditional love.

That is where you came from and where you’ll return.

You came here to learn personal love.

Universal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love.

Broken love. Whole love. Infused with divinity.

Lived through the grace of stumbling.

Demonstrated through the beauty of… messing up. Often.

You didn’t come here to be perfect. You already are.

You came here to be gorgeously human. Flawed and fabulous.

And then to rise again into remembering. But unconditional love?

Stop telling that story.

Love, in truth, doesn’t need ANY other adjectives.

It doesn’t require modifiers. It doesn’t require the condition of perfection.

It only asks that you show up. And do your best.

That you stay present and feel fully.

That you shine and fly and laugh and cry and hurt and heal and fall

and get back up and play and work and live and die as YOU.

It’s enough. It’s Plenty.

There are only two choices in life …


We just celebrated our 2 year anniversary!

So… its totally been a minute since I posted last. I hope you had a fantastic summer full of harvests succulent abundance, colorful sunsets at the beach, and potlucks filled to the brim with friendship and laughter.


Things are super “well” over here on our side of the woods. My husband Nathaniel and I are getting ready to tour over to Europe (our second tour over the pond, whoohooo), to the South of France, then Paris, and Belgium. I am so pumped.

We leave next Tuesday September 22nd – October 2nd. Tomorrow we go to Madison, Wisconsin for two shows (one occurs at 7PM tomorrow night at The Frequency, then a House Show on Thursday night.

In addition to packing and preparing for upcoming shows including one in South Bend, IN on October 16th 2015, I have found time to pair down more stuff.

love, sweet love.

Over the past 3 years I have set the intention to own the things that bring joy or have great seeded functionality in my life and our lives together.
This is the path to minimalism that I am overjoyed by. It is in my very nature to feel free and getting ride of dead weight feels so freeing. (plus its almost autumn and a good cleaning of my drawers feels right on par, as change literally blows in though my window.)
Now we have  set out to own the basics. I mean did you know one can survive and actually thrive with only three cooking pans. Yeah, thats right only three. So we own our oatmeal pot which is really a 3-qt. covered sauté pan, a 8″ omelette/sauté pan, and my very favorite wedding gift the, “Le Creuset Signature Enameled Cast Iron 4.5 Qt. Round French Oven – in the Tiffany Blue color.
Seriously, you could do away with all other pots except for these three and you would be golden.
Here is our Le Creuset – I could not resist sharing a pic, what a great pot.
Le Creuset Signature Enameled Cast Iron 4.5 Qt. Round French Oven - Blue
Of course we have a few other items that we just love and must keep like all of our touring musical gear, and my Mom’s 1980’s sweatshirt that says Hawaii ( it’s just so soft, brings me tons of joy, and I have loved it since I was 10, what a keeper) Hummm… I should so post a pic of me wearing that soon.
Anyways, I digress, so on the front line of purging my things, and my husband’s things
I gotta say that ditching the old to make space for new adventures, opportunities, and abundance feels great!

As I gear up to leave for the second part of our tour I have allowed myself some good pondering time, you know about life, and its purpose, ext. 😉

And this is what I realized recently…

As I am on the cusp of gathering old things remembered and allowing new things into my life this theory arose.

“There are only two choices in life, fear or love.”

This idea reminded me that everything I need is already inside of me as it is in you. That everything I supposedly own I am just renting from God then one day when my soul returns home the things I owned or thought I owned on earth will go back to the earth and others will use it. Its really liberating when you think about it.

“Both you and I must choose for ourselves. There are only two options in this life, love or fear.”
Day to day we must do what suits/is in alignment with our “higher self” the Self you desire to become.
Whatever that looks like to you – you’ll know in your heart then choose based off of that image of you. The you you desire to become – the you that you desire to transform into.
Most people talk about life as if we are here to discover new things however rather we are here to remember who we were in our soul before we came here and re-connect with our soul, the highest version of our self, with ego removed, and false-ideologies removed.
Back to our purer more loving selves. It is about refining our hearts so we will be ready to meet our creator in heaven because “God” ( who is a very loving God, loves us no matter what)
We can either choose to live in hell on earth or heaven on earth, its a shift in choice and perspective. I know what your thinking well what about the people who are starving to death, or are in the midst of massive war heaving there families from their homes… I know your thinking about this because I think about this, and to tell you the truth sorrow, suffering, and despair are happening all around us.
This saddens me to no end. However, choosing to be real with yourself and doing the best you can to choose love even amidst grave crisis will help. Love beckons, love fear beckon’s fear. It is important to choose love to pray for those who need our help, and take loving actions to help them be safe.
We have thoughts, that become words, and words that become actions. If we make sure our thoughts are rooted in love, then our words will sprout into love filled words, and our actions will make a loving impact on those who need us most. 
So, we must all choose wisely. With a collective consiousness towards “God” who is Love. Lets ask ourselves
“What would love do in this situation?”
We must first love our selves in order to love our neighbors as our-self. It takes a second to choose love over fear. This choice occurs thousands of times daily. And if made properly we can transform our world by a tiny shift towards a more loving perspective.
Shine ON from somewhere near lots of green grass in the United States of America///